God Disciplines Those Whom He Loves (Genesis 29:1-30)
I want to open our sermon from the first book of the Bible with a verse from the last book of the Bible, Revelation 3:19.
“Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent.” (Revelation 3:19 ESV)
That verse is an excellent summary of today’s message from Genesis 29:1-30. But this is a message that seems to fall flat today.
We are not told to discipline our children today. We are told that it is unloving and unkind. Rather than disciplining children and teaching them how they are supposed to live in the world, parents are being taught to listen to their children and do whatever ludicrous thing their children tell them. This stretches all the way to the ludicrous notion that a parent is supposed to support the cutting off body parts of children that demand that they are transgender.
Think about our current situation for just a moment and you realize that we are actively being taught that parents are not supposed to discipline their children, but it was not always this way. When I was a kid and had an angry outburst or an act of disobedience it was met with correction of some sort. Sometimes it was to go pick up rocks, there are a lot of rocks in North Central Arkansas. And sometimes my discipline involved a belt or spanking. But there was correction, and it was not thought of as wrong. It was how bad behavior was removed from the child and good behavior instilled. The influence of Christian thinking and the Bible still held enough sway in our culture for us to understand that.
“Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol. My son, if your heart is wise, my heart too will be glad. My inmost being will exult when your lips speak what is right.” (Proverbs 23:13-16 ESV)
The end goal of discipline is that the child will be saved from the way of death and live righteously. It is loving and kind to discipline our children. And it is unloving, unkind, and hateful to just allow our children to run wild. As we will see, there are disciplinary methods that are not spankings for the Lord uses all sorts of things to discipline His people. But to leave our children without discipline is unloving and unkind. And here is the point of the message today. God loves and cares for us, so He disciplines us. He does not leave us to wander in sin. He disciplines us and forms us so that we live righteously.
God loves and cares for us, so He disciplines us.
God Cares For His People (Genesis 29:1-12)
Jacob left on his journey after the Lord had promised to be with him. But this next phase of his life is very difficult, and it is not a short amount of time.
Jacob is on a journey to keep his life and find a wife. Remember, Esau wanted to kill Jacob because of the stolen birthright and deception to receive the blessing (Genesis 27:41). Their mother wanted to protect Jacob, so she warned him to leave, but he seems to have hesitated. His mother jumped into action and convinced Isaac to send him away to find a wife (Genesis 27:46-28:2). So, two things are happening at the same time. Jacob is running for his life and is trying to find a wife. On his journey he ran into “people of the east” (Genesis 29:1). This place is likely a reference to wealthy cattle farmers, folks here sometimes owned camels as well. Remember, as has been discussed in a few previous sermons, this meant the people of the place had a good measure of wealth.
God provided a wife for him very quickly. This should remind you a bit of the account in Genesis 24. Abraham’s servant found a wife for Isaac in rather miraculous fashion. He didn’t have to hunt or search for his wife. She just showed up at the well. And, it is much the same here. Jacob asked the people he saw at the well where they were from and he found out they were from Haran. That’s interesting. He’s headed to Haran to find a wife from the family of Abraham. And when asked about Labon, they say he is doing well and see Rachel, his daughter coming to the well (Genesis 29:3-6).
Now, there is this stone that is repeatedly discussed in the first few paragraphs of Genesis 29. And, for me, this stone adds a bit of humor and colors in the picture of what is happening. There is a stone that is rolled over the mouth of a well. We are told that the stone is “large” (Genesis 29:2). And apparently multiple people needed to be around to move it (Genesis 29:8). But upon seeing Rachel, Jacob moves the stone away all on his own (Genesis 29:10). Hebrew storytelling leaves a lot to the imagination. You are supposed to envision what happens in the story and fill in the gaps yourself. Why do you think the stone’s size is emphasized? Also, why do you think that we are told, “as soon as Jacob saw Rachel….Jacob came near and rolled the stone from the well’s mouth and watered the flock of Laban…” (Genesis 29:8 ESV).
I’ll tell you what I think. A man’s potential is not fully seen until he is trying to impress the woman he loves. And here, Jacob moved that huge stone trying to impress Rachel, fed her flock, kissed her and introduced himself (Genesis 29:10-11). Now, this kiss was likely not romantic. It was probably a customary greeting for family, but I believe he was excited because of answered prayer. And I also believe he already loved Rachel at this point. And so, much like Rebeka behaved upon meeting the servant of Abraham, he fed and watered her flock then discussed their family ties (Genesis 29:12).
Now consider what this means. God brought Jacob out of the wilderness, safely to his family and seemingly out of harm’s way. And, since we know the rest of the story, God also brought Jacob to his wife.
God’s care for Jacob should be seen in this story. God promised to take care of him. And God has brought him to the place he needs to be. God even put Rachel right in front of him rather miraculously.
We should never underestimate God’s love and care for us.
We were horrible sinners, lost and in rebellion against God. We had earned for ourselves God’s wrath and justice. We were without hope and without God in the world. But God sent His Son, who took on human flesh and dwelt among us. He lived a perfect life and accomplished all righteousness on behalf of wicked sinners. He died on the cross and paid the punishment for those who would believe. He accomplished our right standing with God. And all those who turn from ruling their own lives and entrust their selves to the Savior are united to Him by faith and given eternal life. Because we are united to Him by faith, He paid for our sin on the cross and we are credited with His righteousness.
Now, if God gave us so much, in giving us His Son then why would we think that He would fail to care for us in this life? Why would we think that God would fail to care for us and bring us into His presence in the New Heavens and Earth?
“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died–more than that, who was raised–who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:32-39 ESV)
Dark times, such as those that Jacob was enduring previous to this will oftentimes lead us to forget. But we must always remember that God loves and cares for His people and this illustrates that for us.
But we also must understand that God loves us and cares for us even when things don’t seem to be working out well for us. In fact, sometimes our lives get hard because God loves us and cares for us and refuses to leave us as sinful wretches living in rebellion against Him.
God Disciplines His People Because He Cares For Them (Genesis 29:13-30)
God chose Jacob and it was not because he deserved it. God’s choice of Jacob was an act of grace. There is nothing that Jacob did to earn this and the Scriptures tell us this. Notice what Paul says about this choice in Romans 9.
“And not only so, but also when Rebekah had conceived children by one man, our forefather Isaac, though they were not yet born and had done nothing either good or bad–in order that God’s purpose of election might continue, not because of works but because of him who calls– she was told, “The older will serve the younger.” As it is written, “Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated.”” (Romans 9:10-13 ESV)
Not only was this choice made so early that Jacob could not take credit for it, but he repeatedly acts detestably in his early years. Think about what we know about Jacob so far. Jacob took advantage of Esau’s hunger and thirst to trade his birthright for a pot of stew (Genesis 25:29-34). And although he was hesitant at first, Jacob deceived his father and stole the blessing intended for Esau (Genesis 27). His poor father was old, unable to see well, and apparently his other faculties were weak as well. Yet, Jacob deceived him. Jacob is cunning and deceptive. Jacob was a cheat, that is what his name means, and it suited him quite well.
And here is what I want you to see right now. God let Esau run wild. But because God loved and cared for Jacob, Jacob would be broken and cultivated. God disciplines those whom He loves.
This story has a rather ironic element to it. It is the use of Laban to discipline Jacob that is so ironic.
Consider Jacob’s craftiness. That Jacob used Esau’s hunger and thirst to steal the birthright from his brother tells us a lot about him. He was crafty. And he saw an advantage when he had it and was willing to exploit it to the harm of others (Genesis 25:29-34). And Laban was much the same. And it is seen in how he treated Jacob. Laban accepted the work of Jacob for his daughter Rachel. This was a much higher price that was customary. The maximum bride price would later be fixed at 50 shekels (Deuteronomy 22:2). But even this was considered an extravagant price. Ancient laborers would be paid between ½ shekel to 1 shekel per month. Do the math and you find out that Jacob is paying a high price for the woman he loves. 1 shekel per month would end up being 144 shekels and ½ would be 72. This puts the price he will pay for Rachel well into the extravagant zone and that’s not all Jacob did. Laban would get this out of Jacob twice. Laban swapped Leah out for Rachel on the wedding night and got this price out of both of his daughters. Remember, Jacob dressed in an Esau costume and got the blessing from his father who was having trouble seeing, hearing, and touching apparently. And Laban got twice the work out of Jacob by putting Leah in a Rachel costume when the light was low and there’d likely been enough to drink that he didn’t notice anything. Jacob was crafty, but Laban was more so.
Jacob also tended to exploit people. He would take advantage of their hardship if he could find a way for it to benefit him. Jacob had no family around to pay for this or help him. He was alone and Laban took advantage of the situation. What was Jacob going to do? Venture out into the wilderness and go home without a wife. Esau wanted him dead. There was really nothing that Jacob could do. Laban had Jacob right where he wanted him. This should call back the stew incident. Esau was hungry and thirsty, and Jacob took advantage of the situation and got Esau to give up his birthright. Isaac though he was near death and his faculties did not work well. Jacob took advantage of both Esau and Isaac. And now, Laban was taking advantage of Jacob.
God is painfully working to break Jacob of his sinfulness. I want to emphasize painfully here because this is 14 years of unfair labor that he is enduring. Sure, the first 7 years blew by because of his love for Rachel. But that next 7, after the deception, were a hardship. But God is doing something in this story. God is discipling Jacob into the man he is supposed to be. God is breaking Jacob and cultivating him.
We live in a time when discipline is thought to be mean and unloving. It is this way for children and adults who break the law. It’s part of the excuse given for not locking people up for longer and it’s the reason some people’s kids are maniacs. Is it any wonder that people seem to be behaving so poorly?
But that is not at all what the Bible teaches us about discipline.
We see something in Jacob, that we don’t see in Esau and that is the discipline of the Lord. The Lord is actively working to break away the sinfulness of Jacob by making him face someone who is likely more Jacob than Jacob is. Laban is what Jacob would have eventually turned into if left to his own devices. Laban used his daughters to gain the work of Jacob for 14 years.
Notice what Scripture says, God disciplines those whom He loves.
“Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews 12:3-11 ESV)
Why does God discipline us?
It’s because He loves us, and He is working righteousness in us.
I like to work in a garden. And sometimes you do things with plants that seem harsh. Sometimes you must cut certain limbs away for it to be a productive plant. Tomatoes are especially this way. The limb that grows between the main part of the plant and the branch is useless. It will only take away nutrients needed to grow the desired fruit. To bear much fruit that branch must be broken away, or if it’s allowed to grow big it must be cut out. Diseased leaves must be torn off. And it works much the same for us. God must cultivate us in much the same way a good gardener cultivates the plants in his garden.
Now, if you think through the text above, discipline is something that is necessary, but it is not something we aspire to have in our lives. The Lord’s discipline should be something dreaded and avoided. It is easier to work and do what we are supposed to do before discipline is necessary.
Men, if you are currently not leading your home. Then get that turned around before the discipline of the Lord hits you in the face with a shovel.
If you are not loving and caring for your wife as you ought, then you may have trouble coming soon in the form of discipline.
If you are not disciplining your children at home and just allowing them to run wild, then you may soon find an extra dose of trouble waiting for you. The Lord has told us and shown us that discipline is good, loving, and kind. He has told us that we are to discipline our own children and that we hate them if we do not do it. And we will be disciplined if we do not do it. In fact, your kids may end up naturally being the punishment for your disobedience.
If you are taking in pornography and thinking that this will never catch up with you, then be ready to face severe discipline from the Lord.
Wives, if you are not currently loving and serving your family as you ought, then hard times may soon be in your future. The Lord’s discipline may be coming for you.
If you are not working alongside your husband to raise children in the fear and admonition of the Lord, then the Lord will bring correction.
If you do not spend your money as the Lord has commanded, then you may face major struggles as the Lord brings His correction upon you.
Children, if you do not honor your parents, which entails obedience and respect, then you will face God’s disciplining hand. That is discussed repeatedly in Scripture and some of the scariest pictures in all of Scripture are the outcomes of those that fail to honor their father and mother.
What do we do with this? Well, we do not sit in our sin. We turn to the Savior. We repent of our sin and entrust our lives to Him. We begin to remedy the situation as best we can and plead with the Lord for forgiveness and help.
God was doing something loving and kind to Jacob. But I am sure that it did not feel loving or kind in the moment. I am sure that Laban and his actions felt anything but kind. But God put Jacob face to face with his sin, with what he would be like if he didn’t change and began to chip away rather forcefully at his rebellion. This conniving cheat that God loved had to be disciplined. And that is something God has promised that He would do so repent of your sin before you end up being disciplined by the Lord.
Conclusion
God loves His people and cares for His people. But that does not always look like we imagine it to look. We often imagine that looking like the Lord handing us everything we want in this life. But that is not the case. The Lord loves us too much for that. He loves and cares for His people so much that He is ready and willing to discipline us if need be.
If you are reading this today and are living in sin, then this message serves as a warning to you. Repent before the Lord brings a painful pruning upon your life.
R. Dwain Minor